I just finished Dr. Jessica Taylor’s new release, Click. Stalk. Destroy., which recounts the psychologist’s own harrowing experience as being the target of online group stalkers in conjunction with her understanding of criminal psychology. The book starts with a group chat that looks something like this (except the names are different, obviously):
Captaininsecurity: Hey ladies! Wow, it’s been a week!
Fearfullyurs: I know! Trying to get over a cold. Did you see what she posted last week?
Clamhidea: She thinks she’s so perfect, but she’s really so fake.
Captaininsecurity: She’s so full of it and so fake…and she’s ugly. We have to expose her for what she really is.
Clamhidea: I think we should make a website all about her and how fake she is. She’ll never know it was us!
Fearfullyurs: I was thinking we should do fake social media profiles. Use her pictures. Really get into her head.
Underwhelmingatwork: I hate her so much. I think we should do all of it! Just destroy her. Ugh. She’s the worst.
Dr. Taylor goes in in the introduction to explain that conversations like this were being conducted by women who she barely knew in private chats in where she resides in Europe. All of the women seemed self-justified trying to ruin her life. The reasons for the initial abuse are unknown, but rarely is it the case in stalking or cyberstalking. Typically—bullying is driven by jealousy or fear of exposure for something else, but the bandwagon effect is real. Though Dr. Taylor was well-aware she was being stalked, she only learned about the bullying stalkers because eventually, one woman revealed the specific chat to her.
In her book’s intro, Dr. Taylor says the last woman to chime in on the chat was someone that Dr. Taylor had only met once, but everyone collectively agreed to hate on her, insult her, and otherwise do everything in their power to destroy someone who was just an otherwise happily-married working mom thriving in her field.
Like me, Dr. Taylor already had a bundle of challenges in her life, so the cruelty of people targeting her is exceptional. Problematically, online, our humanity gets erased. Even more disturbing, many of these people who were covertly going out of their way to cause harm in Dr. Taylor’s life were also presenting to her as friends IRL—people positioned to gather information about where she’d be doing speaking or media events or just to find out details about her personal life, so they could come together in these chats and pick it apart (projection is what I call it…). They would contact the conference or the media with a slew of illegitimate allegations claiming anything from trafficking women to being the cause of a woman self-harming to to child abuse to having engaged predatory means to get her wife to marry her. None of the allegations were true, of course (again—projection—what people accuse someone of baselessly is often what they are doing or would do).
One of the bigger surprises from Dr. Taylor’s book is that these were women and that a lot of crimes like this are committed by women toward other women; however, systemic conditioning for many perpetuates an undercurrent of jealousy among women, which can cause those who lack liberation or something they perceive the target as having that makes them believe they have a right to act out in sadistic and socially perverse ways.
Decent, non-sadistic people might ask why, and as a survivor of cyberstalking, I was asked this more than once. Why? I have no idea other that I know that in the dark triad of psychology, people who create fake profiles and get off on abusive behavior online while making cookies for the church bake sale IRL are sadists. I know at least one person who was participatory in my abuse relished the suffering of others especially if they felt it was justifiable for whatever reason.
Problematically, however, many of these people legitimately believe their delusional self-justification for their behavior. They think they are exposing something that is corrupt or false when in fact, they are the ones engaging corrupt and false behavior. On a subconscious level, they know what they’re doing is wrong because if they didn’t, they wouldn’t have it hid behind anonymous letters or fake profiles. So, even if you were to ask them—why, why would you do this, they wouldn’t have a valid answer for the chaos they willfully create in another person’s life—again, most often out of jealousy or fear, or so I strongly believe.
Thus, the ‘why’ is irrelevant to the overall reality or heinous illegality of it. In one instance in the book, Dr. Taylor realized that a woman who had attended a book event she hosted had also been in the group chat and had actively participated in the collective effort to ensure it was canceled. Even though they hated her, some still showed up. They scrolled her posts, but they didn’t like them. They collectively made false allegations to get media events of hers canceled. All of the hate they spewed in their forum was totally unfounded, which is why I feel it’s a combination of envy and internalized hostility that resulted in this. It could also be because they felt personally called out by her other written work and research as she talks about the toxicity of the culture of victim shaming and blaming, which happened with her and the police in this book. When people victim shame or blame, it’s really a reflection of their own impotence in being able to provide assistance for a situation, such as when a series of rapes (in Texas if I’m not mistaken) resulted in a curfew for women. I know in my case, people felt called out when I wrote about how to raise one’s energetic vibration as to not continue the revolving door cycle of low-vibrational relationships once I escaped the one I’d been in.
Again, regardless, the coerciveness and cruelty of the people who engage this behavior is real. The fact that some of these people pretended to be her friend solely to gather information for the group’s approval is something that I have had to become well-aware of. In my own experience with group stalking, which is far more common than Google would have anyone believe, I had a slew of people come into my life under pretenses of knowing me and wanting to be “helpful” even though I definitely didn’t remember them and know I’d never met them before.
Some of these sadistic individuals (and yes—in the dark triad of psychology, as discussed, sadism is when a person behaves in a way online that they would never behave in person) go so far as to contact the target’s family and other friends. They attack their workplaces.
Long after I left The Frenchmen, someone in Birmingham sent them a letter (written by AI—I presume) claiming that “my behavior” on Facebook was possibly damaging for the business (so, I guess whoever was reporting back didn’t have a clue what was going on in my life). I know many of them went to my mom’s store and talked shit. I’m well aware of the extent of the abuse that people attempted in my life to create discord and divisiveness. The lack of character really astounded me—if you have a problem with someone, you take it to them, but you don’t endgame character assassination behind their backs. Like, who TF gossips? What grade are you in? Lol. I digress.
These stalkers are emboldened by the reality that our police forces are woefully ill-equipped to handle these issues, and what’s more—members of the police, military, fire department, education system, medical system, and other systems designated to protect and serve are commonly participatory. It’s much-like it is in any other arena that involves mass surveillance—they walk among us from all arenas of life. Dr. Taylor recounts more than one story where high-ranking police and military officials were responsible for stalking former partners. I also had a friend who was stalked by a former partner who was part of the police force where she lived, and the attacks by him and his peers was so aggressive that she had to move house.
If the intent of the behavior on the targets and their families wasn’t so deleterious, it would be comically pathetic—again, it’s adult bullying because in my experience, group and cyberstalking has nothing to do with romantic obsession—it’s motivated by envy, hatred, and / or fear because people within these stalking cults intend to destroy the lives and careers of their targets. In some cases, their aim is for the target to take their own lives. I know for free that was the intention in my case. I have physical proof (or rather— a detective has it) wherein my phone, which I purchased after my last relationship ended, had that individual set up as my legacy contact, a discovery I made in the winter of 2025, nearly a year after the relationship ended. Suffice to say, I was shocked, but I documented it and continued collecting evidence.
The reality, too, is that because this form of abuse (group cycberstalking) is so novel, it’s often misunderstood and misdiagnosed as a psychiatric disorder (the hyper vigilance and paranoia can mirror schizophrenia as pattern recognition is a vital aspect of tracking group stalking behavior). But I will say—being group stalked does have very real psychological consequences. I had a nervous breakdown as a result in April of 2026, and the systemic psychiatric system mishandled it grossly. Their failure combined with the impotence of the police in taking these things seriously merit the target learning how to truly manage the abuse, which in some cases can go on for years.
Here’s what you need to know about the people who engage this behavior (from my observation):
1. They’re being low-vibe AF. For whatever reason—you don’t need to waste time trying to understand why—I did, but don’t bother—understand they don’t deserve your energy. They are, for whatever ungodly reason, jealous of you. And hey, if you’re one of these people and you’re reading this jealousy of mean means you lose a child and your spouse dies and you have a fuckton of childhood trauma to re-parent, so good luck with that. Try not to blow your brains out like I almost did.
2. They’re going to keep hiding behind screens—they’re rarely going to actually step out and physically hurt you, so any threats or defaming statements are just projections on their parts. Although, I was at one point roofied and sexually assaulted by someone involved, which I have reported to a detective. I also will add that as in Dr. Taylor’s case, with the faux friendlies, there have been some people who have shown up—I know, just to gather information, which is why I’m very selective about who I tell what to.
As for you—here are things you can do to help safeguard your mental and physical health from stalkers that worked for me.
1. Do your best to ignore them if they create false narratives about you to others. If someone makes false accusations, you can easily and logically talk to anyone you’re doing business with or who is in your professional arena. Stay calm. Let your character speak for itself. Keep showing up as your authentic self—never stoop to the level of the people who are targeting you. Equally—don’t over-explain. Part of the reason group stalking is effective is that it is designed to make you look insane when you try to explain it. When it first started happening to me, I was giving different people bits and pieces of what was happening as I worked to put together pieces of the puzzle and make order out of their chaos. Also—if strict challenges your credibility, learn to ask rhetorical questions that make the person who has false allegations about you question the integrity and veracity of the claims against you. (Note that if someone makes allegations about a person to you, then ask for proof of those claims. Don’t just take someone’s word at face value.)
2. You can protect yourself by keeping to yourself. You often know who your real friends are. Don’t overshare and keep track of what you say to whom and how that does or doesn’t circle back to you. I don’t divulge a lot, but I did say one very specific thing to only three people in the summer of 2024, and that exact line came back to me through an anonymous fake Facebook account in late summer of 2024—the initial cyberstalking account.
3. Pay attention to where people are coming from. Be wary of people who are too friendly or helpful too early. Be wary of people who want you to trust them or open up to them. I have the same things to say about the abuser I dated. I will say the same things ad infinitum because they’re true. Always be honest. Being group stalked isn’t something I talk about anymore as if it’s a present matter because as far as I’m concerned, it’s in the past. I no longer give it my attention or energy. My MS Word has attempted to be hacked no fewer than 15 times in the last few days. I remain unbothered. I’m focusing on what deserves my attention.
4. Assume that everyone is on your side. This contradicts the mindset of defensive people, but it’s a flex I learned from Tara Schuster’s Buy Yourself the F—king Lilies. She said to assume that people are cheering for you and want to see you succeed, so I only see support even though I’m aware that there are some people who are like the characters described in Click. Stalk. Destroy. But here’s the thing—since a lot of people showed up wanting to get information to report back to their group, they acted kind and helpful, so that’s all I know. By assuming that everyone has my best interests at heart, I have been able to remain grateful for everything I’ve learned in this process. If there’s negativity being spread about me behind my back, I remain clueless about it because this obsession is not a two-way street.
5. Trust the universe. Everything that’s happened in my journey has ultimately been to my benefit, so there may be actors out there who want to cause harm, but the universe will always have my back—and yours, too; it will always be conspiring to your benefit, which means that even if people are trying to harm you in some way, the universe is always going to be sticking its foot out to trip those people up. Have faith. Don’t let the fearful drag you down but do take the lessons as they come without judging them as good or bad. In my experience with being group stalked, I learned how to really set and hold boundaries and to protect my energy.
And finally—this is for those who might be part of groups like this, groups that get off on gossip and spreading false rumors and harassing people—know that while it might feel like community, you’re bound by fear—fear of exposure, fear of betrayal, and fear that you’ll be the next target if the group turns on you for whatever reason. If you decide to individuate and no longer participate, you run the risk of being ousted by the community. If you start to raise your frequency or advance in life, someone from that group will tear you down because while they’ll say to your face that they want you to have what’s best for you, consciously or subconsciously, they do not want to see you rise. They do not want to see you thrive. I know because when I was in the relationship I was in, as soon as good things started happening to me or for me, even though that partner wanted to ride my coattails to success, they started to degrade me every time my vibration rose to keep me at their level and to stop me from leaving.
They weaponized the same kind of leverage people living in a fear-based mindset use to keep group members complicit in criminal activities like stalking. It’s the mistaken mindset that if everyone is in it together, then everyone is protected, but as seen in Dr. Taylor’s case—someone eventually told the truth and showed her all of the proof of the hatred and lies and cruelty behind the screens that no one had the courage to confront her with.
I’m fully aware that the negative impacts on my own mental and emotional health—and on my family’s overall health, were not of any consequence to the people who did things like chase me and my kids with trucks, try to run me off the road, show up at my door and act out in a predatory manner, or approach me at a brewery among other things—like manipulate my mental and emotional health online—fully aware, so now I’m directing the conversation to something more serious—the reality that this kind of behavior is only going to get more prevalent as time marches on.
I’m only addressing it today because upon finishing Dr. Taylor’s book, I think that people should be aware that this is far more common and real than people realize. And bet—if it can happen to me, it can happen to you. Parents in particular need to be aware of this kind of behavior and warn and educate their children about the potential for cyberstalking online—what to engage with, what not to, and when to get a parent involved.
I will say this part is extremely serious and should hold weighty punishments—there are adults who will target children. They will target the children of an adult target, so while I’ve learned in two years to be unbothered, I realize that children are far more vulnerable, and sadly, while I cannot fathom the psychosis that would make an adult behave like this, I’m aware that they exist. If you’re a parent looking for resources, there are plenty out there. For example, there is someone called Dale The Cybersafety Guy on Substack. I’ve seen him on Instagram as well. He provides incredibly good resources for parents in the digital age. Given the sad reality your child might become a target whether or not you ever are, I highly recommend him, and I suggest taking his advice seriously.
Again, I’m bringing this up because Click. Stalk. Destroy. is an important and psychologically informed read. I’m bringing this up because this is going to be how stalkers are going to engage in the future. It’s already happening, but I strongly agree with Dr. Taylor that it’s only going to become more common. The TV-movie stalkers who harbor unwanted romantic interests and lurk in the shadows as well as the physically violent predatory former partners are more-than-likely going to go with less-regulated and less-trackable cyber means to target victims.
They operate by gaining access to your entire digital life—or as much as they can. They access to your email, your phone, your personal data—they will monitor your calls and messages. They’ll hack your devices. Those working in groups will maintain a physical distance but will send “friends” to meet you IRL to gather information to report back to the group. They’ll try to ruin your relationships and your personal and professional life. They can operate in disturbingly high numbers—in one instance, an Instagram influencer had thousands of people stalking her and because the numbers were so high, her case was actually excluded from a study Dr. Taylor referenced in her book.
The people who participate rationalize their behavior by saying, “Oh, I only sent one message”, or “Oh, well I was helpful this one time”, and the answer coming from a target is—absolutely not. Feigning friendliness while operating behind a screen to hurt or report or on or undermine another human being is stalking. It is illegal, and the justice system will catch up eventually, making things like digital footprints easier to subpoena records for. It is my hope that psychological and emotional abuse are more commonly punished by the justice system. At one point, I said—and I meant it at the time—I’d rather they have just beat the shit out of me than molest me psychologically. It would’ve been faster rather than trying to drive me to commit suicide.
To the survivors out there who have had to endure this kind of bullshit behavior from other humans, do your best to not show that it’s getting any attention from you. Document TF out of it. Talk to a genuinely trustworthy person or people in your life about it because you are not going crazy, and you deserve support. Report it. If your police force lacks a cybercrimes unit or you have reason to believe police are involved, go to the FBI. Avoid using social media apps for more than you have to since those are among the easiest access point for hacking. Get a different phone from an iPhone. Look online to see what’s recommended that’s the least hackable. I’d also recommend changing your phone number if you become a target. Also, learn what internet phone numbers are—I Google every new number I am offered. In my area, they start with 209 (typically) after the area code. Predators like to use these numbers because they aren’t associated with their real identity. They’re often dropped after they’re used to initiate contact with you—and bear in mind a lot of people on the internet are using fake names (the only people who do that have something to hide unless it’s for a business or brand or something like that).
And finally—on the metaphysical forefront—remember that you create your reality with your thoughts. What you see is reality. I know this kind of stuff exists, but I believe that everyone has my best interests at heart, and I believe in the good in everybody who comes into my life. I believe that the universe protects me from anyone who might have self-serving or entitled motives. I believe in the faith I carry in my heart, so that’s the reality I see all of the time. If there is anything undesirable happening behind these scenes or the screens, I miss it entirely because the universe is always conspiring in my best interests, and you can trust it’s always doing the same for yours. If you have integrity and are of like thought, word, and action regardless of who is or isn’t watching, then you will be okay. I have faith in that for myself, and I have it for you.